There I was in the checkout line at Target today, (I know, it’s my favorite store!) when I had quite an unsettling experience.
I’ll set the scene for you; it’s the Monday before Halloween, around lunch time. The store is apt to be a little busier during this time of day and time of year. I know I was getting the supplies I needed for our Halloween party, and saw others with such items as well.
I was unloading my cart, having let a lady with one item step in front of me, when what to my listening ears should I hear? But a condescending woman, speaking quiet clear.
“So busy!! All these ‘little’ stay at home ‘mommies’.”
Sadly no, that is not what was said. Captain America was not there to save the day. Neither were any of the Avengers. (Although I think Black Widow would have been on this woman before I got my head up.)
I’ll go ahead and take a little “guess” myself (since this lady decided to make such a knee-jerk choice to assume everyone there was a “lowly, lame, sad, Stay at Home Mom*”) that she doesn’t have kids.
*SAHM through the rest of the article. (And no, we are NONE of those things.)
I’ll go ahead and also assume she has NO idea how hard we actually work. Yes, I am a SAHM. A PROUD one!
She should not just run around assuming because a business is a tad busy at a LUNCH HOUR, that everyone is a “little stay at home mommy”.
Maybe these women, we’ll say they were all mothers just for the purpose of my rant, are on their lunch break? Running to Target to get a few things for their child’s costume, grabbing the snack needed for the class party, or getting bags of candy for the neighborhood trick-or-treaters, instead of eating lunch.
(And because they know that Target will have what they need, they always do! I love you, Target!)
So what if all of us were SAHM?! What? Are you better than us and don’t have to wait in a short line?! We are all waiting, learn some patience! (And trust me, you aren’t better than us, certainly not with that “little” tone.)
She probably has no idea how hard a SAHM actually works. I run my website and all of my own social media accounts for it, take care of our child and household, while supporting and being present in my Husband’s job. That’s like three full time jobs, I have no helper or assistant, and yet I’m patient enough to stand in line and be polite.
Some SAHM’s run successful in-home businesses. Some run successful craft businesses. Some work part time out of the home. Some work evening/night shifts to be with their kid(s) during the day. Some are also students and are working toward a degree. A lot of us volunteer at our child’s school, with charities/non-profits, at churches, and in the community.
All while keeping the child(ren) taken care of, errands ran, house kept, schedules organized, etc.
Do you want to try? No. I don’t think you do.
Potty needs or bad dream at 3am? Yep, Mom is awake.
Sick at school? Mom is on the way.
Class party? Mom will help plan it.
Also, SAHM’s are smart. Many have degrees or left careers because their children were more important. We have brains, and thoughts, like any normal adult! We can have conversations, and even vote! (I know! “Say it isn’t so?!”)
Does it sound like we just sit with our feet up on the couch all day, “watching our stories”? No?
We work our tails off during the day and still have a dinner ready on time.
So please, before you run around judging someone because they chose to put their child first, know that we sleep a little better at night knowing our families are cared for, our households are (mostly) in order, and we work harder than you.
PS – This is also why wine and chocolate exist. They are really made for us, but we’re nice, and know how to share. #YoureWelcome