“Everything I have ever let go of has claw marks on it, “ said David Foster Wallace, and the words ring true to anyone going through major changes. Some of the changes are subtle and welcome, even a bit expected – while others are dramatic and turbulent, shaking you up with your roots and making it difficult to get back to normal.
While you’re going through this transition, the rest of the world is going on with their lives, just passing you by, and you may be left wondering how long you have to wait until you feel like yourself again.
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It doesn’t matter what kind of changes you’re going through, really, if it’s moving to a new place, going through a divorce or welcoming a child into your life – a few tricks from psychologists will make it all better.
Here is a quick guide to how you can take better care of yourself during this time, and make sure you grow out of your cocoon when it’s time to come out.
Take your time
Turbulent changes can affect your external world right away, such as going into a new relationship, getting divorced, or experiencing the loss of a loved one – but your internal life needs time to cope. Whatever it is you’re going through, make sure you don’t act for the sake of action; meaning, you don’t have to do anything about it right now just to have it over with.
We tend to rush this transitional stage because it feels uncomfortable and unsettling, but your inner life needs more time to cope and come to terms with things.
When you rush this phase, you may end up finding yourself in the same situation in a little while as you never had the time to grow out of your cocoon. Find temporary structures to handle your emotions, in the meantime, and take little breaks during your day to address these changes.
Imagine your future
Going through a transitional stage you never wanted to be in, in the first place, may mean that you’re also resisting the turbulence that have yet to come. By allowing yourself to explore the changes, you’re triggering your imagination, and you might even realize that the future doesn’t look so grim, after all.
Don’t rush this step, though, and remember that it may take a lot of time before you’re even willing to explore the changes. First of all, you need to take care of yourself and dedicate time to working through the changes within – then you may start exploring the idea of what your life will look like in the future.
People have different ways of dealing with this, and an excitement for the unknown can be found in an online psychic reading as much as in conversations with your friends. It’s all about triggering a certain curiosity for what is to come and a sense of excitement, even if you never wanted the changes and have resisted them all along.
Accepting your new situation and imagining your new life is a great way to burst out of your cocoon by the time you’re ready for it.
The stage you’re in now, the transitional phase, should be a time of peace and comfort until you’re ready to face the world again with new vigor and an excitement for what is to come.